Saturday, January 06, 2007

Continuing to Face the New Year

I mentioned yesterday not feeling well, and expressed worry that it might be strep again. I asked my mother if white spots on my throat necessarily indicate strep throat, and she replied that she thought so, and advised, in her characteristically cheerful way :-) that I should see a doctor because, "you can die from strep." Thanks, Mom! (I don't think she reads my blog anymore!)

But I have a feeling that it isn't strep. I don't have a bad fever this time. I'm functional. And the state of consciousness that characterized strep was that I felt deeply out of it, whereas my present state of consciousness feels more like my experience of a cold: I feel enveloped (not entirely unhappily) in a kind of bubble of dulled perception and reduced emotion, but I am perfectly capable of thinking and concentrating on things (which I wasn't when I had strep). I just have reduced energy and feel easily overwhelmed if I try to take stock of all that I have to do -- but the latter is not too dissimilar to my usual state of being these days!

Other than this, I'm not distractingly miserable. So, I'll give it a few more days.

Ok, I realize that my "phenomenological self-diagnosis" is probably not medically well-grounded, but I am increasingly interested in the everyday variations of our states of consciousness and how they affect our perceptions of our life, and our effectiveness.

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