Ok, back to the personal. Avid and devoted readers may be wondering about certain things from my previous posts that have been left dangling. (Or, even if not, my own artistic sense for closure and completeness compels me to do this bit of catching up.)
Music: My last two postings on music (40% and Hiding One's Light) were a bit steeped in regret. Has anything positive been happening in my musical life? Actually, yes. I recently played something on my baroque flute for a friend's ordination, and that went pretty well. And I've been doing a good job of keeping in practice, especially on my Irish flute, which in some ways is the most demanding of my instruments. I had thought about trying to find other Irish traditional musicians in my area this summer, but I'm enjoying the chance just to consolidate my own playing a bit, for now.
Travel: "Didn't you say you had two more trips coming up this summer? When and where?" I will be departing on my second trip tomorrow in fact! I'm rather shockingly calm about it all right now. Rather than say much about what it is in advance, I think I will wait and comment on it afterwards. For now: I'll be leading some dialogues, helping people to learn about points of view different from their own. The other faciliators and I have been carefully planning a mode of leading dialogue that we hope will be effective in this respect.
Opportunities and Decisions: In another recent post (Overwhelmed), I noted that I had been asked to take on something rather big. So, what did I decide, then?! I decided to postpone it for at least a year. This coming year I need to devote to writing. Then another opportunity knocked on my door. I said no to that, too, for a similar reason. Finally, a third opportunity knocked on my door. I said yes to that one, because it is harmonious with my current, "can writing be an effective form of activism?" question/trajectory.
Do the details of these recent invitations matter? To the extent that they do, the details will seep out in their own time. But for now, what matters (and what may be meaningful to those who are not me) is that I am learning that saying "no" to enticing but nevertheless not-quite-right opportunities is very clarifying and empowering. I feel good about these decisions. I feel like these seemingly negative decisions are actually positive decisions because they hold open the contemplative space I need. My ability to say "no" reflects a growing ability to believe in myself as a writer, and to center my identity around that call for at least the next year. The one opportunity I said "yes" to will help me to learn more about the potential of the web for sharing writing and for building networks of collaboration.
5 years ago